Mission life

When I first accepted an assignment in Afghanistan, I thought I understood resilience. Earlier in my career, I had spent three years as an OSCE representative in the remote Naryn province of Kyrgyzstan — a place of breathtaking mountains, underdeveloped infrastructure, and winters so cold they tested both endurance and creativity. That experience, along with years in international development and an MBA in my pocket, gave me confidence that I was ready for anything.

Yet nothing prepared me for what Afghanistan — with its complexity, unpredictability, and intensity — would teach me about what it really means to endure, adapt, and grow.

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Resilience Isn’t Bravado — It’s Rhythm

Resilience is often misunderstood as toughness or unshakable confidence.

In Afghanistan, I learned that resilience was about rhythm — small daily anchors that gave stability when everything else felt uncertain.

My anchors were simple:

• A short walk in the compound after sunset.
• The ritual of morning tea with colleagues.
• A five-minute breathing exercise outside under the sun.

These tiny patterns became my invisible armor.

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Boundaries as Survival

One of the hardest lessons was learning boundaries. In a context where everyone is stretched thin, it’s easy to feel guilty saying yes to every meeting, late-night call, or endless crisis update.

But I discovered that without boundaries, I had no resilience. Protecting quiet time and creating a clear stop to my workday wasn’t selfish — it was survival.

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Small Habits, Big Shifts

Resilience for me was built on consistency, not grand gestures:

• Evening journaling: “One positive aspect of the day” kept me focused on what is important around me that is grounding me in this condition.
• Breathing breaks: Few pauses throughout the day, no matter what, to reset stress.
• Weekly connection: A cup of tea with colleagues where we talked about everything except work.

These small habits often restored more energy than an entire weekend of rest.

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Naryn vs. Afghanistan: Two Faces of Resilience

Working in Naryn taught me endurance of a different kind — braving isolation, scarcity, and unforgiving winters.

Afghanistan, however, demanded resilience of the mind and spirit, in a place where every day carried security concerns and political volatility.

• In Naryn, resilience meant learning to live simply and adapt to lack.
• In Afghanistan, it meant protecting mental space, setting boundaries, and finding calm in uncertainty.

Clearly both environments shaped my approach to such conditions. But Afghanistan with a lot more uncertainty in the air, has sharpened the lesson that resilience is as much about mindset as it is about survival skills.

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Resilience is Collective, Not Just Personal

Perhaps the greatest revelation was that resilience isn’t only individual — it’s communal.

My Afghan colleagues, who lived with far greater uncertainty, modeled extraordinary strength. Their humor, hospitality, and ability to find light even in hardship reminded me that resilience thrives in community.

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Lessons Beyond the Mission

• An MBA gave me frameworks and strategies.
• Naryn gave me endurance.
• Afghanistan gave me perspective.

It taught me that resilience is not about pushing harder but about creating space to breathe, to connect, and to recover.

Resilience is a way of living — learned one habit, one boundary, and one shared laugh at a time.